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Welcome to Project Car Hell , where you choose your eternity by selecting the project that's the coolest... and the most hellish! Yesterday, the Warsaw Pact Hell Truck Projects ran just about neck and neck, with the trio of Romanian AROs beating the Soviet GAZ-69 in a 51:49 split. Today… well, after looking at all the backyard Lambos I've found lately, it seems like a good idea to have some real Lamborghini Hell Projects. Most of the time, it's tough to find a Lamborghini that isn't in great shape, since most of them don't exactly wear out their odometers during their lifetimes, but we've got a couple of genuine projects for you! You know what really counts most in the hearts of rabid highly devoted Italian-car freaks aficionados? Originality. A low-mileage original Italian supercar is sure to shatter your sanity knock 'em dead, but the prices- holy crap! Still, if you're willing to expend a lot of blood a little elbow grease, you can find a nice original...
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Welcome to Project Car Hell , where you choose your eternity by selecting the project that's the coolest... and the most hellish! Yesterday, the Warsaw Pact Hell Truck Projects ran just about neck and neck, with the trio of Romanian AROs beating the Soviet GAZ-69 in a 51:49 split. Today… well, after looking at all the backyard Lambos I've found lately, it seems like a good idea to have some real Lamborghini Hell Projects. Most of the time, it's tough to find a Lamborghini that isn't in great shape, since most of them don't exactly wear out their odometers during their lifetimes, but we've got a couple of genuine projects for you! You know what really counts most in the hearts of rabid highly devoted Italian-car freaks aficionados? Originality. A low-mileage original Italian supercar is sure to shatter your sanity knock 'em dead, but the prices- holy crap! Still, if you're willing to expend a lot of blood a little elbow grease, you can find a nice original...
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Welcome to Project Car Hell , where you choose your eternity by selecting the project that's the coolest... and the most hellish! Last time, the '72 Stutz Blackhawk blackjacked the Buickborghini and stuffed it in the trunk, for disposal in a hole in the desert later on (the way so many Blackhawk owners in Vegas solved their problems back in the day), according to the 71% of you who voted that way in the Choose Your Eternity poll. Today we're going to go with a couple of choices that allow me to use not-often-seen-in-PCH flags in the poll: Romania versus the Soviet Union! 1989 wasn't such a great year for Romanian strongman Nicolae Ceauşescu , but, even as the rabble beat down the jeweled doors to his palaces, he could console himself with the inspiring thought that the "Romanian Jeep," the ARO 244, was available for sale throughout the world. Even in the evil, decadent United States, a truck shopper could march right into a seedy office above a taxidermy shop in...
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Welcome to Project Car Hell , where you choose your eternity by selecting the project that's the coolest... and the most hellish! The sporty Simca beat up on the magnificent Humber in our last Choose Your Eternity poll , meaning France gets the PCH Superpower trophy… once it's out of the shop, that is. Today we're going to look at the sort of cars that desperate motivated sellers often refer to as "head turners." You know, it's weird and sort of cool, but also sort of horrible… and wouldn't it be fun to own one? The Basement Lambo was great, but who's got that kind of time? You might not want a Fiero-based Fieroborghini , but how about something in between? Say, this tube-framed, turbo Buick V6-powered Lamborghini Countach replica (go here if the ad disappears), which is priced at a low, low, super-low $8,000! Now, part of the reason this car is so cheap might be that the general pall of loserness cast by the sword-sliced Muncie home invaders (see photo...
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Welcome to Project Car Hell , where you choose your eternity by selecting the project that's the coolest... and the most hellish! We had as close to a tie as you're going to see in the Hell Garage, last time around, with the '77 911 Turbo just barely beating the '78 911 Turbo in the poll. Now it's time to return to some mano-a-mano PCH Superpower action, and not only that- it's time to look at crazy orphan cars from across the ocean, cars that will make passersby shun you like the freak you are admire your rebellious spirit. France versus Britain! Simca versus Humber! You got your Reliants and your Lloyds, but when you're talking about weird British marques that Americans can't identify… well, it's tough to beat a Humber. You get your Rootes Group-ish Chrysler-influenced styling, Lucas Electrics, and ahead-of-its-time technology (well, not really, unless the time is being set in Detroit) with the Magnificent Humber Sceptre ! Just look at that fine hunk...
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Welcome to Project Car Hell , where you choose your eternity by selecting the project that's the coolest... and the most hellish! We saw the '49 Rolls Silver Wraith hold its own against the obviously unbeatable burn-victim Countach, gaining a respectable 41% of the vote in yesterday's Choose Your Eternity poll. Today we need to contemplate a couple of Porsche 911 projects; sure, we see 928s here on a regular basis (for obvious reasons), but it's pretty tough to find a real 911 for a PCH-worthy price. Today we've done even better, with a pair of turbocharged 911s, each priced in used-Honda-Civic territory! When most of us try to sell a car using an online classified advertisement, we do our best to take a useful photograph or two and write some sort of description laying out the good and bad facts, if only to avoid having to answer the same questions from every single potential buyer. When you're trying to sell a Porsche 911 , this becomes way more important, because...
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Welcome to Project Car Hell , where you choose your eternity by selecting the project that's the coolest... and the most hellish! Yesterday, we saw a 6.9 Benz face defeat for the first time in Project Car Hell history, a feat that generally requires unholy intervention by the Prince Of Darkness himself, or at least the presence of Citroën badges. We've had a run of affordable Hell Projects lately, and that's fine… but sometimes we need to mainline some optimism and look at spending a few more bucks at the gateway to Gearhead Gehenna. We've had some PCH Lambos before, including a Diablo , another Diablo , an Urraco , an Espada , and another Espada. But we've never had the most Lamborghini-ish Lamborghini of them all, the ridiculously awesome Countach . Sure sure, the Countach would get eaten up by a lot of not-quite-supercar factory hot rods these days, but you still need one! The problem is finding one that's an affordable project, which isn't easy… but we've...
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Welcome to Project Car Hell , where you choose your eternity by selecting the project that's the coolest... and the most hellish! It seems that the Japanese won't be celebrating an improbable victory over PCH Superpower Britain this time around, with the Land Rover beating the Nissan Patrol 57% to 43% in our poll . Today we're going to return to a couple of perennial PCH heavy hitters, cars that we all really really want , yet make us stagger back in awe and horror when contemplating the magnitude of the task they represent: the Mercedes-Benz 6.9 and the Jaguar V12! There are ordinary Project Car Hell vehicles, and then there are the heavyweights . The projects that, in the words of the prophet John in Revelations 20:10, will have you "thrown into the lake of burning sulfur, where the beast and the false prophet had been thrown. They will be tormented day and night for ever and ever." In fact, the Book Of Revelations is the only shop manual you'll need with a PCH...
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Welcome to Project Car Hell , where you choose your eternity by selecting the project that's the coolest... and the most hellish! When we last dove into the triazadienyl fluoride -filled Garage-O-Pain, we learned that eternity with a Lancia Scorpion would be better- or maybe worse- than eternity with an Austin Healey Sprite race car. We've been neglecting our four-wheelin' friends for too long; in fact, the last time we pitted one four-wheel-drive truck against another was last winter's Farm Equipment Edition PCH . So here we go- does PCH Microbe Japan have any hope whatsoever against PCH Superpower Britain? We'll find out today! You hear a lot about the Toyota Land Cruiser , but don't forget that Nissan also made an off-road truck back in the day! That's right, we mean the Nissan Patrol, and you can get this '69 (go here if the ad disappears) for under a thousand bucks. Well, that's the asking price; reading the statement "i have it parked behind...
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Welcome to Project Car Hell , where you choose your eternity by selecting the project that's the coolest... and the most hellish! Yesterday, the Ferrari 328GTS vanquished the Japanese upstart NSX in a PCH Superpower Smackdown, which should make fellow PCH Superpowers Britain and France- unsettled since a Glas beat a Lotus day before yesterday - breathe a sigh of relief. Today we're going to let a couple of Superpowers have at it, in a Sub-$500 Race Car Challenge: Britain versus Italy! With UDMan's '63 Corvair raising the Index Of Effluency stakes for next year's New England 24 Hours Of LeMons , anyone who shows up with the same ol' snoozeworthy RX-7 or Camaro will be the object of well-deserved ridicule by his or her peers. You need to limp roar onto the track in a car manufactured by one of the Big Three PCH Superpowers, and we've managed to find one that already has a roll cage! In fact, this '68 Austin Healey Sprite is a proven racing champion, having...
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Welcome to Project Car Hell , where you choose your eternity by selecting the project that's the coolest... and the most hellish! We had another too-close-to-call one yesterday, with the Toyota 4x4 Van and the Dodge Caravan Turbo locked in a 176-171 near-tie, according to the Choose Your Eternity poll . Today we're going to escape from Suburban Minivan Land and roll down the mean streets of the Early Gangsta Rap Era, with the kind of rides that Ice-T wannabes might have selected for high-speed runs to Vegas back in the day. And, yes, it's another upstart challenging a mighty PCH Superpower: Japan versus Italy! It's bad enough shoving a Japanese car into the PCH ring with a Ferrari, but a Honda ? However, when you want an NSX yet you don't want to spend more than 20 grand… well, you have to figure that the Soichiro Stamp Of Approval was probably removed from the car (with 50-grit sandpaper) a few years back. And so it is with this 1992 Acura NSX (go here if the ad disappears...
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Welcome to Project Car Hell , where you choose your eternity by selecting the project that's the coolest... and the most hellish! Last time we had another PCH Superpower upset, with Germany beating Britain in the Glas Versus Lotus challenge . Britain will come back strong, of course, but for now Germany can enjoy the pool of oil gathering beneath the Project Car Hell trophy. Fast forward to today; since it's Maximum Minivan Day , we're going to have Maximum Project Minivan Hell. For a Toyota to qualify for Project Car Hell, it must be rusty, rare, and packed with impossible-to-find options. We've found all three with this 1989 Toyota 4x4 van (go here if the ad disappears), which has some body rot (in a refreshing display of honesty, the seller sums it up in a single word: "Rusty") and the super-rare-in-North-America 4x4 drivetrain option. There's an assortment of minor (you hope) repairs to do, and it's nearly certain possible that the overheating problem...
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You know what's been missing from all the 24 Hours Of LeMons races so far? That's right- Soviet-made cars! It's been tough watching all those races without the accomplishments of Lenin, Stalin, and Trotsky being represented on the track, but that's all going to change at the Detroit event next year, because Teargas has braved the wilds of Canada to bring back a genuine, made-in-the-USSR 1987 Lada Signet! You may remember this car from Project Car Hell Cold War Edition a while back, and making the jump will get you the rest of the story. galleryPost('LemonsLadaBuy', 6, '1987 Lada Signet Readies For 24 Hours Of LeMons Detroit'); You'll need to start the video above to get the full effect of Teargas' story. Natasha has arrived. Comrade Davin and I have returned from their heroic journey to Toronto, Ontario. On the Great Hero Trailer of the Proletariat, we spirited Natasha from her prison in the only moderately socialist Canada. Her captors were brutal...
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Welcome to Project Car Hell , where you choose your eternity by selecting the project that's the coolest... and the most hellish! Yesterday, we found a way for a Citroën SM to lose a PCH challenge: set up a pretty nice example as a clay pigeon to be blasted to dust by a heap of vaguely Ferrari-ish parts. No, it wasn't fair, but it proves the point that the SM still reigns as the King Of Project Car Hell. Now that we're in an upset sort of mood, let's see if it's possible for a German project to take on one of the Big Three PCH Superpowers and win! What the hell is a Glas ? Glas was the company that built the beloved Goggomobil , but it got gobbled up by mean ol' BMW and the marque disappeared after 1968. Before BMW axed Glas, however, you could buy the sporty 1700 GT from BMW dealers as a sort of Glas/BMW branding mashup, and that appears to be what this 1967 Glas is. The top bid of $260.55 failed to meet the reserve price, so we're pretty sure the seller will...
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Welcome to Project Car Hell , where you choose your eternity by selecting the project that's the coolest... and the most hellish! We all knew that the Nixonian Cadillac Fleetwood limo had no chance against a Citroën, and our most recent Choose Your Eternity poll confirmed our assumptions. Any Citroën is tough to beat in a Project Car Hell Challenge, due to the off-the-scale readings Citroëns always register on both the Hell-O-Meter and the Cool-O-Meter. And a Citroën SM? Forget it! Even with a fairly nice SM, you'd need some kind of weapons grade project to have any hope against the car made by the French and Italian governments, the pure Essence Of Hell Project centrifuged down from a large quantity of seriously cool machinery and then offered at a price that draws you in like a black hole dragging you past its event horizon. Well, guess what? Even if we'd found an ad for the actual Apollo 16 Lunar Rover , hauled back to Earth by a North Korean spaceship, burned up on reentry...
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