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After spending a billion (or three) dollars on market research, the elite Chrysler media team achieved a coup de grâce in the Muscle Car Wars by getting the new Challenger SRT8 positioned on the front partition of the southernmost magazine rack at Memphis International Airport's "LiterAIRy" bookstore/Elvis memorabilia depository. It was the greatest achievement for the automaker since securing the covers of every automotive magazine and Salt Water Fishing Weekly for the Plymouth Breeze. Said Chrysler media executive Ed Gersten, "So goes the Memphis airport, so goes America." Surveys show that people's beliefs are directly linked to the composition of magazines in airports, which explains the popularity of Mitt Romney and girls dressing like whores. Carthage, Tennessee homemaker Betty-Sue Hambone was brimming with excitement as she looked at the rack saying "Orange, orange, look at all that orange. I must have one. What is it? Oh look, Katherine Heigl in...
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