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newVideoPlayer("/91_Chrysler_Colt_Quebec_494.flv", 506, 423,""); We're pretty sure that the woman driving the '87 Sundance up the Stade Olympique in Montreal is not Céline Dion- though all the YouTubers swear it's her- but this ad for the '91 Dodge Colt does appear to feature Quebec's most famous daughter. First she dances with some scurrilous-looking gents, then leaves a swath of destruction behind her rebadged Mitsubishi, which is powerful enough to melt parking meters .
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newVideoPlayer("/70_DodgeDartSwinger_494.flv", 506, 423,""); Since my cultural knowledge has giant gaps when it comes to old TV shows, I have no idea whether the character of the super-stereotyped Southern Sheriff in this ad was lifted from a TV show or created from scratch for this ad. Either way, it appears that he's getting ready to put the Dodge dealer on the chain gang for the crime of giving the Sheriff's wife an automatic transmission in her '70 Dart Swinger at no extra cost. How about a 4-speed manual at no extra cost?
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newVideoPlayer("/Redd_Foxx_Colt_45_494.flv", 506, 423,""); What did hep early-70s skiers crave most on the slopes? You got it- tall cans of Colt .45! Aaah, nothing feels quite as good as staggering helplessly into a snowbank, your ski pants sodden with unnoticed urine and the meat of your knuckles shredded from some other skier's busted bicuspids- yes, that's what skiing is all about! But what if you've run out of 16-ouncers and you've assigned Redd Foxx to beer-run duty, and he's driving "Redd's Sled," which appears to be a rally-prepped, fender-flared proto-Colt/crypto-Galant of some sort? Hilarity ensues! Bonus points for anyone who can identify the car; I've been watching this thing like it's the Zapruder Film, and the best I can do is interpret those round pillar emblems as probable Colt items and say "Colt with weird taillights" or maybe "Cricket after a Bondo attack."
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newVideoPlayer("/89_Dodge_Spirit_494.flv", 506, 423,""); You're out in the desert, waiting for the intense Reagan-era patriotic rush of a Space Shuttle landing- a rush even more intense than watching Sylvester Stallone pound the crap out of a giant Russian- but then you get distracted by this amazing car approaching out of the shimmering distance. Surely a car this advanced must be European or Japanese, right? Hell no! It's the 745th iteration of the K platform, the sorta-all-new Dodge Spirit!
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newVideoPlayer("/56_Dodge_Welk_494.flv", 506, 423,""); Lawrence Welk's band performing a brain-damagingly bouncy rendition of "The Camptown Races" around the campfire with a '56 Dodge as the subject of their serenading? Bring it on! We're a little skeptical about the claim that the Dodge broke all the records at "Bonn-E-Ville" (though a '55 Dodge did set 306 records after driving 31,224 miles in 14 days there); we think Lawrence should have done a big brake-stand burnout with that 315 Hemi on live TV.
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newVideoPlayer("/90_Dodge_Shadow_Quebec_494.flv", 506, 423,""); Imagine a world where Detroit cars dominate, yet French is the language! Yes, Quebec in 1990 was such a place, and Chrysler knew those wacky Habitants wouldn't be able to resist the allure of the Dodge Shadow… provided, of course, that local girl Céline Dion- or a lookalike- performed a very strange baby-seat-summoning dance ritual in their ads.
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newVideoPlayer("71_Charger_Topper_476.flv", 463, 387,""); A certain 60s movie and a certain 70s TV show have ensured that the 1968-70 Chargers will always overshadow all the others. But what about the '71-74 Charger? The 1973 model was the best-selling Charger , and in 1971 you could get whitewalls, hubcaps... and the landau vinyl roof - at no extra charge!
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newVideoPlayer("78_Dodge_Magnum_476.flv", 475, 376); The venerable Chrysler B-Body platform still had some life left in it by the Late Malaise Era, and that meant that the descendant of the Super Bee and Charger was going to roll with T-tops A Cord-type grille, sophisticated instrumentation, and electronic wizardry. Oh yes, and a 140-horse 318, though you could also opt for the 360 or 400 engines. This ad rates about a 6 on the Disco-O-Meter (with the Black Gold 280ZX scoring a perfect 10).
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If you wanted more truck for the buck back in 1966, a truck that could haul a big buffalo-filming camera and came with such amenities as a padded dash and carpeting... well, cowboy, you better change your ways today or without the Dodge Adventurer you will ride! We can see the inexorable process of turning work vehicles into macho-themed commuters beginning here. Is it even possible to buy a "luxury delete" pickup truck today? And, now that I've got "Ghost Riders In The Sky" stuck in my head, let's watch Johnny Cash perform it with the Muppets!
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An automatic transmission! Hubcaps! All standard! Yes, it's no wonder the jowly small-town police chief assumes his officer has been taking bribes from the local Dodge dealer, no doubt in exchange for overlooking various legal indiscretions. And what better car for a key party than a Swinger ?
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