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newVideoPlayer("/jerk-us-around.flv", 494, 371,""); Senator Larry Craig (R-Bathroom Fondling) was the member with the balls to grandstand in front of the open Senate in pursuit of relaxing the congressional ban on offshore drilling ban on some coastal areas. From every other distinguished member of the Senate, this wouldn't be funny. But then again, not every other member of the Senate have been busted trying to allegedly fool around in the men's room. [ CrooksandLiars ]
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newVideoPlayer("tony_mendez_talks_chevron.flv", 506, 423,""); With everyone still consumed by gas prices and no foreseeable end in sight, David Letterman sent his cue card boy Tony Mendez to Chevron's headquarters to talk gas prices with the company's CEO. The payoff is pretty great and the key that this is obviously a fake. Ignoring that the person claiming to be David J. O'Reilly looks nothing like him, and forgetting the stack of video recording equipment in the corner, no CEO at any oil company has a sense of humor. [Source: The Late Show With David Letterman]
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Come on, admit it. The last time you put $75 of gas into your Camry, this crossed your mind. Like any other commodity, it's easier to steal gas than it is to pay for it. So if you're looking for a way — totally for informational purposes, of course — here's five of the best — and a really bad one — to do it: 5. Siphoning Fuel From Someone Else's Tank newVideoPlayer("StealGasSiphonPump_gawker.flv", 506, 423,""); Pros: Being able to pick the location, secluded is best. The ability to directly target your enemies. Relatively simple and cheap. Cons: No way to check how much fuel is in the tank before you decide to steal it. Applying suction by mouth may result in severe vomiting, recurring nightmares, cancer, addiction. Instructions: Insert a small, stiff pipe into a vehicle's gas tank. Apply suction. When fuel starts to flow, place pipe exit below tank height and fill jerry can. 4. The Old Switcheroo newVideoPlayer("StealGasDwarf_gawker...
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newVideoPlayer("Matt_Hardigree.flv", 506, 423,""); For those of you who don't get Fox Business Network but do like to drink in the middle of the day, we've pulled down the video of Hardigree rapping about fuel prices and luxury cars. You can just see him start to have a stroke as Stuart Varney starts asking about "High-Test" instead of premium fuel. We're going to add "massive eyebrow shifts" to the rules of the official car pundit drinking game so call a cab or take the train home. But hey, Stuart likes the name so maybe he didn't notice Matt having a stroke...
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newVideoPlayer("KC-Fire.flv", 494, 371,""); It looks like the Magellan Oil Refinery's just what the gas price doctor ordered to make sure those high Memorial Day prices stay around the same price as the per-pound-sticker on a Kansas City strip steak. OK, maybe that's just what "Big Oil's" doctor may have ordered. We're not so much happy about what just happened in Kansas City when a storm moved through the area yesterday and set Magellan's huge 1.2 million gallon vat of unleaded ablaze, clouding the landscape with acrid black smoke. At first when we heard the reports of the thick smoke, we thought maybe Kansas City had oversized its jets or needed to drop the needles a bit, as it seemed to be running on the rich side. Alas, this was not the case. ( Hat tip to Johnny! ) [ Fox4News ]
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newVideoPlayer("freegunwithcar.flv", 494, 340,""); It's not too much of a surprise to hear that this car dealership in Missouri is offering a free gun with the purchase of a car. It's also fairly common these days for dealers to lure customers in with gimmicky offers of free stuff or cheap gas . But there's just something about the combination of both incentives under one roof that gives us a warm moist feeling of hope for an America where all car dealers everywhere will sucker-in fearful consumers to showrooms, regardless of which mainstream media-induced panic the customer suffers from. [ KMBC-TV ]
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newVideoPlayer("CNNbeaters_Jalopnik.flv", 494, 390,""); The image associated with this post is best viewed using a browser. It's no mystery that buying a new pious Hybrid to save money on gas is a bit counter-productive. Yeah, you'll spare pennies at the pump and score points with the eco-snob crowd, but the cost of that new car is likely to still end up costing you more than what you'll be saving on gas. But what if you could save gas with a car that's hardly costs anything to buy? That's what these gearheads are trying to do. They've parked their full-size trucks and bought old beaters for daily driver duties. Proving it can be done in style, one guy even went for a vintage Subaru Brat complete with rear-facing jump-seats! You hear that truck guys? Now you've got " gas prices " as the perfect excuse to indulge in that secret little Japanese fantasy you've always had. [ CNN ] Hat Tip to Sugi!
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newVideoPlayer("540gas_Jalopnik.flv", 494, 320,""); Think the prices at your local pump are high? If you aren't in California, don't feel so bad. Sure, you may be paying $4 per gallon , but whatever. Because as our auto-loving friends on the Cali coast know, yes, it really does cost $5.40 per gallon. You non-Americans may scoff, what with European prices being around eight thousand dollars per gallon, but for us this cost is simply outrageous. Don't oil companies know this is America? We'll never stand for such prices. Or at least we'll just sit here in our cars and wait it out. [ CNN ]
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newVideoPlayer("GasWarsDetroit_gawker.flv", 475, 276); At least that's what Glenn Zimmerman, a reporter at the local Detroit ABC affiliate WXYZ insinuates may not happen in the not-so-positive effects-of-capitalism case we reported on earlier today . He's questioning whether the local Marathon gas station owner who, after the victim allegedly showed up on site looking to and eventually causing a ruckus, reportedly shot his BP-owning competitor in the head will end up being charged with anything. And all this over three pennies on the gallon. Jeez, can't we all just get along?
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