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newVideoPlayer("/84_LTD_494.flv", 506, 423,""); The Fox-based '84 Ford LTD really did handle pretty well… if you checked the boxes for all the suspension options that came on the cop version when you bought one, that is, and for some reason that bit of info doesn't get much play in this ad. This ad would have been far more entertaining had Mr. Bondurant taken the base version out for some door-handle-scraping racetrack action. Why, some madmen even autocross the Fox LTD!
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newVideoPlayer("/70s_Renault_18_Diesel_494.flv", 506, 423,""); When you've got 66 mighty horsepower clattering under the hood, you know no chains can hold you! Does the Renault 18 chained up in a Roman amphitheater symbolize some sort of Italian-French automotive rivalry? And how many clutch discs were destroyed during the filming of this ad?
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newVideoPlayer("/88_929_James_Garner_476.flv", 506, 423,""); Remember the late-80s Mazda 929? It was supposed to be big, fast, and capable of blowing away Infiniti, Acura, and Lexus on the showroom floors; Mazda managed to meet the first two goals, but the last proved elusive. What to do? Bring in James Garner!
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newVideoPlayer("85_Fiero_V6_476.flv", 506, 423,""); I had my very first college spring break in 1985, just like the guy in this ad... only I didn't have the opportunity to catch a ride to Fort Lauderdale from an attractive 80s chick in a brand-new Fiero. No, my '85 spring break involved catching a ride to Tijuana in a Bondo-and-primer '66 Fairlane reeking of exhaust leaks and beer farts. I must have gone to the wrong school! This guy, on the other hand, went to a college with an all-Fiero-driving female student body, so he could afford to be picky.
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newVideoPlayer("80_Chevette_Dealer_476.flv", 494, 413,""); You Chicago-area folks might remember Timmy of Long Chevrolet in Elmhurst, in which case you've already been inoculated against the effects of this stunning combo of Malaise Era machinery, bad suits, brain-scouringly bad UHF production values, and Timmy's shouts. Chevettes Chevettes Chevettes!
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newVideoPlayer("82_Mopars_476.flv", 463, 387,""); You could be stuck in a snowdrift, spinning the rear wheels on what appears to be a mid-70s Buick... or you could head on down to your Plymouth dealer and buy one of the fruits of the US Government's bailout of Chrysler Corporation: The 1982 Horizon, Reliant, and TC3! Remember the TC3? Yes, the Plymouth clone of the forgettable Dodge 024... and who could forget the Horizon Miser? Still, these cars helped haul Chrysler out of the abyss.
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newVideoPlayer("Yugo_Midas_476.flv", 463, 387,""); Those of us who appreciate a Turbo Yugo or a potential 24 Hours of LeMons Yugo know that the little Yugoslavian Fiat 127 shouldn't be considered a mere object of derision. However, Midas joined the Yugo-bashing brigade with this ad making light of a fatal-looking hubris-fueled Yugo wreck. Whatta ya gonna do?
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newVideoPlayer("84_Corolla_Japan_476.flv", 463, 387,""); Here's another in a long line of jittery Japanese-market car ads, this one showing how a pack of tie-wearing Toyota shoprats can whomp together an '84 Corolla for fashion-deranged monogloved chopsocky experts and fedora-wearing, flask-in-bottom-drawer newsies alike, all thanks to the mighty powers of the Munificent Plutonium Wrench.
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newVideoPlayer("85_Pioneer_Stereo_476.flv", 475, 376,""); Now, we've seen some incredibly dated ads in the Classic Ad Watch series, but this one pitching Pioneer stereos may well be more of its time than anything yet. We've got all the elements: the 80s vision of the 50s vision of babe-itude, the drum-machine/synth theme song, cassettes and CDs, and a yuppie cokefiend in a Porsche. But maybe this ad gets out-Eightied by one of the others in the series; jump like Adnan Khashoggi's henchmen tossing a crate of Ollie North-authorized grenade launchers into an Iran-bound cargo plane to vote on this burning issue! 1985 IROC-Z Camaro 1983 Chrysler E Series 1985 Vauxhall Nova 1986 Chevrolet Camaro 1983 Pontiac Trans Am Yes, yes, we know- most of the ads are for 3rd-gen GM F-bodies. Hey, that's the 80s for you (and the Super Potential Starion ad got pulled from YouTube)! Gawker Media polls require Javascript; if you're viewing this in an RSS reader, click...
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newVideoPlayer("Dopehound_KITT_476.flv", 475, 376); With all the focus on the new KITT yesterday, it's good to spend some time remembering the classic KITT. Apparently in hopes of counteracting the insidious influence of Jeff Spicoli on America's impressionable youth, 80s icons Nancy Reagan, Brooke Shields, Mr. T, a talking Pontiac, and David Hasselhoff joined forces to get the message out: Say Nyet To Intoxicants!
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